You know…I’ve been sitting here thinking about all of the dance competitions we went to and how much fun they were. They were lots of work, loads of driving, packing, bun making etc….but very fun and so fulfilling to see my child gain so much and learn a lot from the experience! I’m also thinking about all of the swim meets. They were twice weekly during swim season, for several years. I was always sitting in the stands cheering her on. I had to buy her the right warmup suit, swim suit and those T-shirts with the team name. We were always there supporting our children!
I also have been thinking about all of the tea parties, sleepovers and birthday parties that I’ve put on. I’m thinking about the nights that I was up rocking my sick babies. I’m reminiscing about the trips to my daughters’ school to take forgotten homework and lunches, after I’d already started work. I’m thinking of the annual “night before the first day of school” at home manicures and curlers in their hair. I always got them new outfits & I paid for extra dance lessons so that my older daughter could try out for Dance Team/Pom.
I’m daydreaming about First Communion prayers, parties and the way I taught them certain special prayers. I’m thinking about how I helped my girls with their homework. I always got involved in their projects and book reports without the use of the internet or a computer! I remember my 2 daughters at their different stages. I spent many hours reading books aloud to them while at the same time teaching them values, and instilling good ethics and integrity. I gave direction to their lives as opportunities arose and used everyday experiences to instruct them in the ways of the world and trying to do the right thing.
I found groups to join, such as the YMCA “Indian Guides”; in order to give them happy experiences and good memories. Most of all to spend more time with them! I always put the beginning and final touches on their birthday cakes while sometimes arranging “picnics in the living room” on rainy days! We would drive all the way to the Toledo zoo because it felt nicer than the zoo that is a bit closer to us and I wanted to give them the best experiences. My daughters and even sometimes their BFF’s, were dressed alike in matching animal outfits with little hats and glasses.
I tried to work a few less hours so that I could visit my children’s school and help out as a “room mother” and even pop popcorn with the PTA moms!! We’ve driven over 1800 miles one way, to take my daughter to visit someone; when I didn’t have to…. and we did that more than once! I was the one reading, singing and telling stories night after night! I enjoyed it and found such fulfillment in loving my girls more than anything or anyone else. They were always my number one priority as was their happiness and safety.
Finally, I was beaming at being called “awesome” by my youngest and her fiance, this past Holiday Season. It was because the grooms parents were not happy with switching the whole wedding to have it 6 months earlier than planned!! Suddenly I was rearranging everything so it could all happen in just 3 or 4 weeks time instead of the original 6 or 7 months! Speaking of the wedding, we drove around without even thinking anything of it; and we happily did much of the “legwork”. I made the bridal party gifts; the Swarovski crystal heart earrings that the Maid of Honor and bridesmaid wore at the wedding. For the Bridal shower, I made all of the food, decorated the house and I ordered a beautiful photo cake. I had originally bought little gold bags to fill with 3 colors of M & M’s for wedding favors. Then the wedding colors changed and so I bought two more colors of little mesh bags to fill with the colored M & M’s. My husband and I filled and tied each little bag, while sitting on the floor the night prior to the wedding. I had even bought some adorable personalized mini tags that I had found online. These tags had the bride and grooms names, wedding date, and the words “thank you for coming” printed on them! I found and bought the Unity candle and arranged the Scottish Highland dancers to come and do the traditional dances; welcoming the groom to our family. I called around to find a florist that could get some Scottish Heather, the traditional flowers of Scotland. We also spent a couple of hours with another florist, picking out flowers, arrangements, colors, ribbons and whether we wanted the Silver sparkle leaf or a green one? My daughter left the important flower order decisions, regarding all of the wedding flowers in our hands. My BFF had offered to pay for them as her gift to the bride and groom, so she met us at the florist as well.
I set up the nail appointments, hair appointments and the professional make up artist appointments for my daughter and the girls in the wedding party, because she asked me to do it. I had more time because she was working. While I was with the girls the day of the wedding, my husband drove to get the wedding cake. After picking up the wedding cake, he also drove to the hotel about 20-25 miles away and checked the Newlyweds into their room. He did this so that later when they arrived exhausted; they could just go straight to their room! They would not have to worry about going to the front desk and getting a key, checking in and all of that! I bought a 5 lb box of chocolates and some sparkling grape juice, which my husband put in a bucket with ice so that the newlyweds would be surprised as they entered their room and they could have a special toast to their awesome day! The toast was to be made with a pair of special wine glasses that I painted the words “bride” and “groom” on! The wedding was on January 11th, 2014!
This post started out by discussing my role or roles in making memories for my girls lives. I discuss the time during the lives of my two daughters, when they were young and growing up with a single mother, for the most part. Then I wrote about the time leading up to my younger daughters wedding in January 2014. Now it is May 2014…..four months later, and “Mother’s Day” came and “Mothers Day” went. I did not get a phone call. I did not even receive a card this year. I cried. It is the one day we get honored annually, for giving birth to our children and for raising, loving, giving, teaching and sacrificing our lives for them . It’s not about the one day, it’s about an entire lifetime of giving and loving, and sacrificing etc. I couldn’t wish my mother a “Happy Mother’s Day” but it is because she past away in 2012 of colon cancer. Try to remember all that your mother has done for you. It’s a cumulative thing, not just a short time period, or one day. If you get upset with her about something, try to still let her know that you really do love and appreciate her and all that she’s done. Because like I’ve said, Mothers’ Day is not about just that one day, it is thanking her for giving you life and all that she’s done for you and the love that she’s shown.